My topic this week is the always fun, but kinda gay topic of, “If I could be a woman…who would I be.” Well it would be really short and boring if I just came right out and said who I would want to be. So instead I will give you a list of people you couldn’t pay me to be and people that I could be.(all of course if I was forced to make the decision.) First the people you couldn’t pay me to be. (on a scale of 5 to 1, 1 being wrose)
5) Rosie O'Donnell- she only comes in at number ten because she has the unique ability to piss of really rich people and she is not dead yet.
4) Courtney Love- what a train wreck of and individual.
3) Michael Jackson- …..come on now. You have never wondered?
2)Lynne Cheney- she is married to a Dick, the most evil person in America.
1)Barbra Bush- ….all that dumb. So much dumb. What a sad life
And there is the 5 women you couldn’t pay me to be.
5) Aimee Gilbert- She said I couldn’t use her because I was going to say “She would be dating me” and “that’s not funny, that cocky” Whatev Aimee!
4) April Rickles- you know why.
3)Billie Jean King- she dominated her sport.
2) Oprah Winfrey - she gots the money
1) Ellen Degeneres- She is one of the funniest people alive and she still likes women.
There is my corny and dumb list of women I would want to be.
Wednesday, August 13, 2008
Wednesday, June 11, 2008
Simply Frustration
This blog is really just for me to get out some pint up frustration. I made the mistake of giving a lovely, vigorous, handsome young man the blog topic of evolution. This was my mistake. I should have asked him privately. Matt, all I cared for was your opinion. I value your opinion and some of what you usually have to say. I also appreciate most of those that debated with him. It helped me out. When I gave Matt this topic, I was very interested to find out what he would write. Some were a little upset about what he had to say. I was a little surprised on what he had to say. Matt believes in the Bible. Just because you disagree with Matt doesn’t make you any more right. You were not there when the Bible was written.
Did you know that monks, scholars, and scribes were in charge of writing the Bible from its original text? They didn’t have a printing press. This means that the ORIGINAL Bible could have been messed with. Something could have been added, something could have been taken away. Do I believe it was messed with? Heck no. But it is a possibility. All I am trying to say is you were not there when the Earth was created. I think it is very foolish of us to limit God to only one way the Earth and Heavens could have been created. He is God!! He does what he wants! In the Bible it says that God created the Earth and the Heavens in six days and on the seventh he rested. Does God really need rest? Or was the potential poem just a way to set up the Sabbath?
I understand both sides of the debate. The Bible reads that the world was created in six days and God rested on the seventh, so that’s what the truth is. I gotcha. God created us through some sort of evolution. Starting from a big bang (that God made happen no mistake) and through the years of soupy-monkeyness, came us. Gotcha. Good points. I am not saying this is wrong. Either one. Simply because I am dumb. I don’t know all the answers. One day I will ask somebody that does. (HINT: God)This isn’t something that makes or breaks the relationship with God. I believe it’s a detail. Humans like to understand things. Jesus spoke in parables to help us understand things too complicated for our little brains.
On to new Business.
Those who think you are going to hell because you are gay or know someone that is gay. Your dumb! Shut up! No one values your opinion. Yes, being gay is a sin. So is throwing a baby against a wall. Which one does God hate more? Both! If you lie then you are the same as the gay person! If you are a guy and you look at an attractive woman too long (Matt and Jeff, this one is for you) then you are the same as the gay person! Sin is a sin is a sin. Don’t speak for God! Just a guess, but I bet He doesn’t like it.
Continuing
The people that rally against gay people or people that are about to get an abortion with there picket signs and hate calls, shut up! Stop wasting air! Practice lock jaw for me. I am convinced that you do not change the way someone is by yelling things at them. My mom does it to me and I ignore her. But when my dad comes up very calmly and tells me something, depending on what he just told me, my reaction is much better than being yelled at. There are two ways to change someone.1) Love them unconditionally. Be the best friend they need. Love them like you love yourself. If you were getting yelled at, you would want someone to come help you out; wouldn’t you? Get to know that person. Try to understand where they are coming from. Be sensitive to their feelings. (It’s a hard thing to do and I really am not trying to do that on this particular blog) 2.) Brute, unmerciful force! It’s my personal favorite. If someone is doing something you don’t want them to do then beat the living dog mess out of them. Wachovia them for all I care.
A message to Matt
Those who know Matt, love him. Those who just read his blog…umm not so much apparently. So let me set you straight on Matt before we go ripping apart the poor, skinny, pale, helpless, misshapen, fragile young man. All jokes aside. Matt is the closest thing to Jesus I know. I think that’s what we all strive for. To be like Jesus? It’s like trying to reach perfection. It is impossible. No one can be perfect. All we can do is strive to become it. He has always been there when I have needed him in the short time I have known him. Thanks buddy. (Cult meeting on Friday, right?)
A message to the masses
I am a broken pathetic person. I sin. I suck at life. But so do you. : ) At least we are in this sad state together. Let’s also try to get out of this state together.
HAVE A BLESSED DAY
Did you know that monks, scholars, and scribes were in charge of writing the Bible from its original text? They didn’t have a printing press. This means that the ORIGINAL Bible could have been messed with. Something could have been added, something could have been taken away. Do I believe it was messed with? Heck no. But it is a possibility. All I am trying to say is you were not there when the Earth was created. I think it is very foolish of us to limit God to only one way the Earth and Heavens could have been created. He is God!! He does what he wants! In the Bible it says that God created the Earth and the Heavens in six days and on the seventh he rested. Does God really need rest? Or was the potential poem just a way to set up the Sabbath?
I understand both sides of the debate. The Bible reads that the world was created in six days and God rested on the seventh, so that’s what the truth is. I gotcha. God created us through some sort of evolution. Starting from a big bang (that God made happen no mistake) and through the years of soupy-monkeyness, came us. Gotcha. Good points. I am not saying this is wrong. Either one. Simply because I am dumb. I don’t know all the answers. One day I will ask somebody that does. (HINT: God)This isn’t something that makes or breaks the relationship with God. I believe it’s a detail. Humans like to understand things. Jesus spoke in parables to help us understand things too complicated for our little brains.
On to new Business.
Those who think you are going to hell because you are gay or know someone that is gay. Your dumb! Shut up! No one values your opinion. Yes, being gay is a sin. So is throwing a baby against a wall. Which one does God hate more? Both! If you lie then you are the same as the gay person! If you are a guy and you look at an attractive woman too long (Matt and Jeff, this one is for you) then you are the same as the gay person! Sin is a sin is a sin. Don’t speak for God! Just a guess, but I bet He doesn’t like it.
Continuing
The people that rally against gay people or people that are about to get an abortion with there picket signs and hate calls, shut up! Stop wasting air! Practice lock jaw for me. I am convinced that you do not change the way someone is by yelling things at them. My mom does it to me and I ignore her. But when my dad comes up very calmly and tells me something, depending on what he just told me, my reaction is much better than being yelled at. There are two ways to change someone.1) Love them unconditionally. Be the best friend they need. Love them like you love yourself. If you were getting yelled at, you would want someone to come help you out; wouldn’t you? Get to know that person. Try to understand where they are coming from. Be sensitive to their feelings. (It’s a hard thing to do and I really am not trying to do that on this particular blog) 2.) Brute, unmerciful force! It’s my personal favorite. If someone is doing something you don’t want them to do then beat the living dog mess out of them. Wachovia them for all I care.
A message to Matt
Those who know Matt, love him. Those who just read his blog…umm not so much apparently. So let me set you straight on Matt before we go ripping apart the poor, skinny, pale, helpless, misshapen, fragile young man. All jokes aside. Matt is the closest thing to Jesus I know. I think that’s what we all strive for. To be like Jesus? It’s like trying to reach perfection. It is impossible. No one can be perfect. All we can do is strive to become it. He has always been there when I have needed him in the short time I have known him. Thanks buddy. (Cult meeting on Friday, right?)
A message to the masses
I am a broken pathetic person. I sin. I suck at life. But so do you. : ) At least we are in this sad state together. Let’s also try to get out of this state together.
HAVE A BLESSED DAY
Wednesday, May 21, 2008
Hilldale's Whos Who
Most likely to survive another Ice age
Lee
Most deserving of a hair cut
Justin
Most likely to hate the bible and everything it stands for!
MATT BENTON
Most likely to play a horrible song on guitar
(Two way tie) Justin and MATT BENTON!!!
Most likely to choke if you come close to there throat
Aimee
Most likely to be a absolute a-hole
Steph Benton sister of MATT BENTON
Most likely to hit on you jokingly
Andy Rickles
Most likely to hit on you non jokingly
Faith's Group
Most likely to look like a retired porn star
Jeff Roberts
Most likely to shake your hand 5,982 times in 2 minutes
Lee
Most likely to be a serial killer
Daniel
Most UNlikely to hook up at Hilldale
Steph and MATT BENTON!!!
Most likely to be awesome
Kevin Brown
Lee
Most deserving of a hair cut
Justin
Most likely to hate the bible and everything it stands for!
MATT BENTON
Most likely to play a horrible song on guitar
(Two way tie) Justin and MATT BENTON!!!
Most likely to choke if you come close to there throat
Aimee
Most likely to be a absolute a-hole
Steph Benton sister of MATT BENTON
Most likely to hit on you jokingly
Andy Rickles
Most likely to hit on you non jokingly
Faith's Group
Most likely to look like a retired porn star
Jeff Roberts
Most likely to shake your hand 5,982 times in 2 minutes
Lee
Most likely to be a serial killer
Daniel
Most UNlikely to hook up at Hilldale
Steph and MATT BENTON!!!
Most likely to be awesome
Kevin Brown
Tuesday, May 20, 2008
Saturday, May 17, 2008
War in Iraq
In the Beginning
With any story, there most be a beginning. So, my friends, I take you back to the Ottoman Empire....but hundreds of years later. IRAQ! This little, pleasant, part of the world in 1979 was ruled by a pleasant, young, and vigorous man. I call him, Saddam. This prime example of a wonderful, carrying individual used his military power to scare the crap out of his neighbors. Iraq and Iran had a war on in the early 80s, that ended in a stalemate. The views of Saddam included complete military control over the region. No matter who happened to be in the region. This military spending cost Iraqi's 35 cents to the dollar. Saddam wanted more military power to handle problems in nation and keep the prestige of a strong military,but lacked the money to do so. So what all power hungry dictating "presidents", do. Invade smaller, much weaker countries.
At this point in time, Kuwait(the soon to be invaded country) had just started putting a government together, and having a military was not in the framework. If Iraq invaded Kuwait then they would own 20 percent of the world's fuel reserves. To a money hungry Saddam, this was appealing. A weak country, with no way t defend its borders and no military in sight. Perfect. Tenting was kinda awkward between Iraq and Kuwait, to Iraq's war with Iran , which Kuwait helped neither side and Iraq said you owe us money because we stooped Iran from invading you. Kuwait didn't buy the story. (to make matters worse, Kuwait lowered there gas prices and there for dropped Iraq's prophets)
August 2nd, 1990, at one o'clock in the morning, Iraq invaded Kuwait. It was probably over at one o two o'clock that morning. Iraq was dangerously gaining control of 20 percent of the worlds reserves.
This scared the holy golden calf out of Saudi Arabia.(Who also was sitting on 20 percent of the worlds oil) With all the military power in the region, Saudi King Fahd called on buddy and great Alli, Pres Bush. Bush the ordered an immediate deployment of troops which was the start of "Desert Shield." If Saddam would have attacked Saudi Arabia when we was on the door step then he could have been half way across the country by the time America could even think of getting troops over there to help. But, he hesitated. There was a build up of American, British, French, Egyptian, and Syrian troops to help with keeping Iraq out.
On the 30th of January, 91, Iraq attacked a small town Al-Khafji in Arabia. And then the butt kickin began. The build up of allies ripped Iraq a new one. (Wachoviaed them! Matt andy Jeff**) In February 28th, Iraqi's high tailed it out of Kuwait.
In the Later Beginning
Much Later than the Beginning (Buy the number$)
So, Its 2008 and we are still in Iraq. Just what in the heck are we fighting for. We have that Saddam guy out. Whats the problem? Well, my great intelligent asking friends, we are trying to install our version of free market and democracy in the wonderful land of Iraq. Didn't know they wanted one. Something so great that we owe $9,357,174,161,490.38. I don't know about you but that is impressive. The estimated population of America stands at 304,014,898 people. Each person would have to pay $30,778.67. Chump change to the wealthy Iraq.THE village idiot went on to say " A free Iraq will fight terrorists rather than harbor them." As Kat Williams so innocently asked, "Have you even seen a Iraqi soldier uniform? Its a turban with a blank tank top, sweat pants and flip flops!" Comfy. Taxpayers in just Birmingham, Alabama will pay $206 million for Iraq war spending. What else could we have done with this money? Glad you asked.
85,878 People could have health care for a year OR
152,092 Homes could run with Renewable electricity OR
5,702 Public Safety officers could be hired OR
2,499 Affordable housing units OR
4,143 Elementary School teachers OR
215,534 Children could have health care for a year
Thousands of kids could be healthy and possibly live. There is no OR after that.
This war has had a huge effect on our economy to this day. Paul Kennedy who wrote the well read book Rise and Fall of the Great Powers, stated that "America's global commitments are greater than its capacity t fun them." This was back in 1987. Since then we have spent four times our Gross Domestic Product (GDP) than our economic rival Japan, and twice as much as Germany. He continued to say "war is burden, but continuous high levels of defense spending can generally have turned a major power to a minor one." Now I'm not saying America is going to turn to a small power just because our economy isn't looking good right now. We have been in a slump before and have been fine. One argument against this "war is bad" theory is that it did get us out of the depression during WWI and WWII. Also then you have to factor in that must of our labor was not sent over seas. Now when we cut down a tree, we send it to China for them to make some furniture piece for us, which we get taxed for, just so they can send the furniture piece back.(Tax free I might add. Thanks Bill:)) Back then, war created jobs. Now, not so much.(except for soldiers)
Going back to what Kat Williams said, we are sitting in a war zone that our enemy dresses like the Innocent civilians and drives cars and trucks loaded with bombs into our soldiers. To date, the U.S deaths stand at 4,079. 174 this year. The worst year was the last year at 902, 2004 saw 849 with 05 just three short of that mark and 06 saw 822 family members, friends, brothers, sisters, uncles, aunts, mothers, and fathers dead. The total death by violence is 83,687- 91,344.
Bush went on to say that "Defeating this enemy in Iraq will make it less likely we ill face this enemy here at home." All I'm going to say is, if you step on an ant bed, do the ants stay in the ground our do the attack what steeped on them. Does the ants stop if you kill one? Or half? or 99 percent?
In MY opinion
I was all for any war after 9/11. I have grown and would like to say have learned some things. I am a better Christian and person than what I used to be. I now think war is never good. Whenever you have to kill/ hurt people, its not a good thing. I'm not sure what else we could have done as a nation besides war tho. These type of extremist, I don't think you can show love to and change there ways. I'm not talking about Iraqis, I am talking about the terrorists. They are brought up to kill all Christians and especially the ones that try to disrupt what they are trying to do. I think on paper, having Iraq a free democracy is a great idea....on paper. If Iraq got a democracy it would be democrazy. (dumb) There would be more killings and assassination than probably ever. Those who think Bush is over there for the oil, then once again he is doing a bad job. We still pay $4 a gallon. I just think little Bush decided to try to leave a legacy by taking out Osama and Saddam. I think we can use our resources on alot more important things than Iraq. Such as economy, aids research, Africa, people here at home, less dependency on oil, anything! The war is going on 3 years past its expression date. This is when you take your hand and slap your forehead and mutter, D'oh!!
With any story, there most be a beginning. So, my friends, I take you back to the Ottoman Empire....but hundreds of years later. IRAQ! This little, pleasant, part of the world in 1979 was ruled by a pleasant, young, and vigorous man. I call him, Saddam. This prime example of a wonderful, carrying individual used his military power to scare the crap out of his neighbors. Iraq and Iran had a war on in the early 80s, that ended in a stalemate. The views of Saddam included complete military control over the region. No matter who happened to be in the region. This military spending cost Iraqi's 35 cents to the dollar. Saddam wanted more military power to handle problems in nation and keep the prestige of a strong military,but lacked the money to do so. So what all power hungry dictating "presidents", do. Invade smaller, much weaker countries.
At this point in time, Kuwait(the soon to be invaded country) had just started putting a government together, and having a military was not in the framework. If Iraq invaded Kuwait then they would own 20 percent of the world's fuel reserves. To a money hungry Saddam, this was appealing. A weak country, with no way t defend its borders and no military in sight. Perfect. Tenting was kinda awkward between Iraq and Kuwait, to Iraq's war with Iran , which Kuwait helped neither side and Iraq said you owe us money because we stooped Iran from invading you. Kuwait didn't buy the story. (to make matters worse, Kuwait lowered there gas prices and there for dropped Iraq's prophets)
August 2nd, 1990, at one o'clock in the morning, Iraq invaded Kuwait. It was probably over at one o two o'clock that morning. Iraq was dangerously gaining control of 20 percent of the worlds reserves.
This scared the holy golden calf out of Saudi Arabia.(Who also was sitting on 20 percent of the worlds oil) With all the military power in the region, Saudi King Fahd called on buddy and great Alli, Pres Bush. Bush the ordered an immediate deployment of troops which was the start of "Desert Shield." If Saddam would have attacked Saudi Arabia when we was on the door step then he could have been half way across the country by the time America could even think of getting troops over there to help. But, he hesitated. There was a build up of American, British, French, Egyptian, and Syrian troops to help with keeping Iraq out.
On the 30th of January, 91, Iraq attacked a small town Al-Khafji in Arabia. And then the butt kickin began. The build up of allies ripped Iraq a new one. (Wachoviaed them! Matt andy Jeff**) In February 28th, Iraqi's high tailed it out of Kuwait.
In the Later Beginning
9/11/01
America was attacked by suicide bombers. 2,948 people lost there lives. This sparked a wave of patriotism, love for our fellow neighbors, compassion, and complete hatred! The hunger Pres Bush(Village Idiot) did what all we wanted him to do. Go Wachovia the people that did this to us. Our main target was Osama Bin Laden, the leader of the terrorist group that CIA and FBI thought that was in charge of the bombing. We bombed and tore up the back country of Afghanistan.
Two years later, FBI and CIA "intelligence"(lies, all lies) said that Iraq has weapons of mass destruction. President Bush came on tv and said that Iraq helped Osama and is now developing WMDs which they are going to aim at us and they are an immediate threat to our freedom and way of life. Once again, we railed the troops and ripped something new in Iraq. Prior to this, the United Nations wanted to check out this whole WMDs story and sent there Chief Inspector, Hans Blix. Hans came back saying that there are absolutely no such thing as WMDs in Iraq. Bush still sent troops.
That was 03. This is 08. War still on.
Much Later than the Beginning (Buy the number$)
So, Its 2008 and we are still in Iraq. Just what in the heck are we fighting for. We have that Saddam guy out. Whats the problem? Well, my great intelligent asking friends, we are trying to install our version of free market and democracy in the wonderful land of Iraq. Didn't know they wanted one. Something so great that we owe $9,357,174,161,490.38. I don't know about you but that is impressive. The estimated population of America stands at 304,014,898 people. Each person would have to pay $30,778.67. Chump change to the wealthy Iraq.THE village idiot went on to say " A free Iraq will fight terrorists rather than harbor them." As Kat Williams so innocently asked, "Have you even seen a Iraqi soldier uniform? Its a turban with a blank tank top, sweat pants and flip flops!" Comfy. Taxpayers in just Birmingham, Alabama will pay $206 million for Iraq war spending. What else could we have done with this money? Glad you asked.
85,878 People could have health care for a year OR
152,092 Homes could run with Renewable electricity OR
5,702 Public Safety officers could be hired OR
2,499 Affordable housing units OR
4,143 Elementary School teachers OR
215,534 Children could have health care for a year
Thousands of kids could be healthy and possibly live. There is no OR after that.
This war has had a huge effect on our economy to this day. Paul Kennedy who wrote the well read book Rise and Fall of the Great Powers, stated that "America's global commitments are greater than its capacity t fun them." This was back in 1987. Since then we have spent four times our Gross Domestic Product (GDP) than our economic rival Japan, and twice as much as Germany. He continued to say "war is burden, but continuous high levels of defense spending can generally have turned a major power to a minor one." Now I'm not saying America is going to turn to a small power just because our economy isn't looking good right now. We have been in a slump before and have been fine. One argument against this "war is bad" theory is that it did get us out of the depression during WWI and WWII. Also then you have to factor in that must of our labor was not sent over seas. Now when we cut down a tree, we send it to China for them to make some furniture piece for us, which we get taxed for, just so they can send the furniture piece back.(Tax free I might add. Thanks Bill:)) Back then, war created jobs. Now, not so much.(except for soldiers)
Going back to what Kat Williams said, we are sitting in a war zone that our enemy dresses like the Innocent civilians and drives cars and trucks loaded with bombs into our soldiers. To date, the U.S deaths stand at 4,079. 174 this year. The worst year was the last year at 902, 2004 saw 849 with 05 just three short of that mark and 06 saw 822 family members, friends, brothers, sisters, uncles, aunts, mothers, and fathers dead. The total death by violence is 83,687- 91,344.
Bush went on to say that "Defeating this enemy in Iraq will make it less likely we ill face this enemy here at home." All I'm going to say is, if you step on an ant bed, do the ants stay in the ground our do the attack what steeped on them. Does the ants stop if you kill one? Or half? or 99 percent?
In MY opinion
I was all for any war after 9/11. I have grown and would like to say have learned some things. I am a better Christian and person than what I used to be. I now think war is never good. Whenever you have to kill/ hurt people, its not a good thing. I'm not sure what else we could have done as a nation besides war tho. These type of extremist, I don't think you can show love to and change there ways. I'm not talking about Iraqis, I am talking about the terrorists. They are brought up to kill all Christians and especially the ones that try to disrupt what they are trying to do. I think on paper, having Iraq a free democracy is a great idea....on paper. If Iraq got a democracy it would be democrazy. (dumb) There would be more killings and assassination than probably ever. Those who think Bush is over there for the oil, then once again he is doing a bad job. We still pay $4 a gallon. I just think little Bush decided to try to leave a legacy by taking out Osama and Saddam. I think we can use our resources on alot more important things than Iraq. Such as economy, aids research, Africa, people here at home, less dependency on oil, anything! The war is going on 3 years past its expression date. This is when you take your hand and slap your forehead and mutter, D'oh!!
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